Q: How do you drive an engineer completely insane?
A: Tie him to a chair, stand in front of him, and fold up a road map
the wrong way.

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Q: When does a person decide to become an engineer?
A: When he realizes he doesn't have the charisma to be an undertaker.

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Q: What do engineers use for birth control?
A: Their personalities.

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Q: How can you tell an extroverted engineer?
A: When he talks to you, he looks at your shoes instead of his own.

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Q: Why did the engineers cross the road?
A: Because they looked in the file, and that's what they did last year

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A mechanical engineer, an electrical engineer and a software engineer
are travelling in an old Fiat 500 when all of the sudden the car
backfires and comes to a halt.

The mechanical engineer says "Ah! It's probably a problem with the
valves, or the piston!".

The electrical engineer says "Nonsense! It's most probably a
problem with the spark plugs or the battery!".

The software engineer says "How about we all get out of the car,
and get back in again, It might work...".