A newsboy was standing on the corner with a stack of papers, yelling, "Read all about it. Fifty people fooled! Fifty people fooled!" Curious, a man walked over, bought a paper, and checked the front page. Finding nothing, the man said, "There's nothing in here about fifty people being fooled." The newsboy ignored him and went on, calling out, "Read all about it. Fifty-one people fooled!"

What's in cigarettes?

Cigarettes contain disgusting things that you would never think about putting in your body. For example, cigarettes contain tar, carbon monoxide and chemicals like DDT, arsenic and formaldehyde (a gas used to preserve dead animals). The tobacco in cigarettes also contains nicotine--the drug that makes smoking addictive. All of these things are bad for your body. Nicotine raises your risk of heart attack and stroke. Tar and carbon monoxide cause serious breathing problems. And you know tobacco smoke causes cancer.  read more

There were these three men stranded on an island in the middle of the ocean. All of a sudden the natives surrounded them, unhappy to see Americans on their island. The angry chief gave them a choice.

“Death or unga-bunga!” He shouted.

The first man really didn’t want to die, so he chose unga-bunga.

The entire tribe bent him over a fallen tree and butt-[filtered word]ed him.  read more

Life Insurance: A contract that keeps you poor all your life so that you can die Rich.

Nurse: A person who wakes u up to give you sleeping pills.

Marriage: It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her masters.

Divorce: Future tense of Marriage.

Tears: The hydraulic force by which masculine willpower is defeated by feminine waterpower.  read more